[ic inbox]

[darkinferno]

Dante Rantanen

"Hey, you've reached Dante. I'm not in right now--you know what to do."

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

[ keybladers ]
[ shitpost central ]

Comments

RECOLLE WORK ON YOUR POSTAL NETWORK aka sounds perfect

[catsudon]

( technically, Yuri himself was never sent any plush cats of any kind. a number of the people he knows were; by now he's aware that retrospec sent out stuffed animals associated to his name, but he has zero clue as to why, and zero answers even when staring at one of the strangely compelling feline-themed plushies.

he doesn't like Dante: it's a knee jerk reaction that leaves him uninvested, though not against speaking to him. life's full of sucking it up and dealing with less than pleasant elements. he converses with worse on the daily in homeroom. ergo: )

to the full extent of my current knowledge: maybe, maybe not.

does that cat seriously have tentacles

[darkinferno]

[See, now, this is how you do it! Yuri gets points for not automatically flying into a rage at the fact that Dante dared to speak to him again. It makes him a good candidate to toy with--easy enough to get the desired reactions out of, but not such a hothead that he can't calm down and have a rational conversation, either.]

very helpful. but i can't blame you for not knowing, everything to do with this network is messed up. if you find out something more, let me know

and yeah

yeah it does

[Attached is another picture of the plushie, this time with all of its tentacles on full display for Yuri to see.]

[catsudon]

yeah i'm not sure why you think i would love to come running to you with new information, feel free to check back in with me on your own.

okay that's

i'm not sure what that is

cute

hideous

both?

[darkinferno]

and here i thought you'd be happy for the chance to have me NOT checking in every day to see if you had an answer yet

[Would he really?

Does Yuri want to risk finding out...?]

i gotta say if i was going to get a stuffed animal in the mail, this isn't the worst one i could've ended up with

be better if it wasn't pink, but i guess you can't have everything in life, huh

im laughing why this

[catsudon]

how you want to waste your time is on you

( Yuri absolutely will risk finding out because he doesn't mind hitting delete once a day on Dante's spam so HA

CALLING UR BLUFF, BOY )

its an octopussy pink is the least of your worries right now
who knows maybe its a bond reference

[darkinferno]

okay look that might be a bond movie but let's not use that word

or call it something else like an octocat

or catapuss that one's good

but i guarantee you most people aren't going to look at that word and think james bond

though i'm flattered you think of me as the secret agent type

[catsudon]

you knew what i meant

anyway it's your catapuss you can call it whatever you want

not any secret agent, just bond

welcome to the shittiest glamorous life may it treat you better than it ever does him

[darkinferno]

well i haven't been shot at yet

i look damn good in a suit

and i'm not too shabby with the ladies

[Ignoring the fact that there's only one lady he's really cared about for the past several years. The point is that he can still flirt pretty well if he's trying to!]

i'd say i'm doing pretty well so far

[catsudon]

congratulations

when it all goes to hell i'll just be sitting here with my popcorn going "i told you so"

( not that he really cares that much, but he had to roll his eyes. always impressive when people tell you how good they are. (yuri. you do this with dancing?) )

[darkinferno]

hope you've got a lifetime supply, because you'll be waiting a while

[Look, in his mind this is just a fact of life. He's been brought up to have good manners and to mingle well. He's been attending galas with household names since before his voice dropped! Don't hate him 'cause you ain't him, Yuri~]

[catsudon]

all i need is one package, i'll save that shit to pop until things go down

for you

not in general or i'll need a hell of a lot more bags than i want to own

( look, how much does he actually care about that? not much at all, tbh, but still. )

[darkinferno]

well there go my plans to send you a truckload of popcorn as a thanks for catapuss

[It's definitely been named now.]

[catsudon]

thank fuck

( literally he would never have been able to fit that in his apartment even if this wasn't sarcasm hour )

[darkinferno]

[Don't tempt him, Yuri!]

that's all right

if i have to, i'll think of something else

[Yeah. YEAH!! Take THAT, random flashback memories! He'll just intentionally use the phrasing from them, what about that?!]

[catsudon]

but why tho

[darkinferno]

because why not?

[catsudon]

how much free time do you have on your hands?

[darkinferno]

it's not a matter of having free time, it's a matter of if i think it's funny to spend the time on it or not

it just so happens that this is

[catsudon]

okay

you do you

[darkinferno]

don't worry

i will

[NO INNUENDO INTENDED YA PERV]

[catsudon]

( DANTE YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE LOOKING FOR INNUENDO, EVER )