[ic inbox]

[darkinferno]

Dante Rantanen

"Hey, you've reached Dante. I'm not in right now--you know what to do."

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

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TEXT → FAST-FORWARD TO FEB 13

[tarotcards]

[ On the morning of the 13th, one day before Valentine's Day, a sudden text message appears from a Souji Seta. Perhaps you've talked to him before. Perhaps you haven't. Perhaps you're wondering why the hell you are receiving a text at six in the morning but look, let's not sweat the small details. Pay attention to the larger ones, like the contents of this very important message: ]

Hello.

Through the tides of fate, you have been chosen to participate in this year's Valentine's Day event: Blind Dating. It is believed that no one should be alone for such an important day and as such, you have been paired up with another lonely soul.

Your match is with Evie Frye. Please contact them to plan out your date for tomorrow.

However, if you and your partner do not know what to do, there will be a booth in Recollé Square for the sole purpose of assisting unsure or confused participants of the event. There will be date suggestions, booklets of pick-up lines, and refreshments.

Happy Valentine's Day.

- Cupid

[darkinferno]

[Hang on a second WHAT--]

hey i told you two to leave me out of this half-baked plan

i'm doing well enough on my own and i'm definitely not lonely

[YOU DON'T KNOW HIM etc etc]

[darkinferno]

[And after looking at Evie's profile picture...

Harumph.]

then again i guess it wouldn't be in the spirit of the day to leave someone expecting a meetup waiting

[but still EFF YOU CUPIDS >:T!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

[tarotcards]

You sure changed your mind quickly.

[ Don't think Souji didn't notice that 8) ]

2/13

[intrepidsister]

Hello,

It would seem we're "Valentines" at least in some sense of the word. Either way, I'll cut to the chase. Meet me at 5PM at the square. Don't be late or I'll leave without you. I've already made reservations at a nearby restaurant. If you foresee any difficulties with our date, please let me know in advance.

Evie

[darkinferno]

i don't know what you're talking about

[8T!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

[darkinferno]

[Well! He isn't expecting her to have already taken the initiative to set everything up for their date. Does this bode well or poorly for him? He's not entirely sure.]

sounds good to me

i'll be looking forward to meeting you in person, evie. with any luck it should be an enjoyable evening

[tarotcards]

Of course. I'm not sure what I'm saying either.

Do you require anything from Cupid or the tides of fate before tomorrow's big day?

[darkinferno]

nah

i think i'll be all right on that front

[tarotcards]

If you insist.

Then best of luck with tomorrow's date. :)

3/1

[alienates]

[ and, as promised, dante is going to be getting a link sent to him. ]

text; misfire!

[twelfthspark]

I think it's time to have some fun. 💃🥂 Is your house free later this month?

AMAZING

[darkinferno]

[Oh. Oh. This is gold. And so, as promised...]



["hard g. it's not spelled JIF.

since you asked."]

[darkinferno]

some fun, huh? you sure you sent this text to the right person?

but hey, i'm always up for some fun. what're you planning?

[Don't think you can get away without letting him in on this now, Arlene...!]

i'm dying

[alienates]

[twelfthspark]

WTF I didn’t even have Retrospec open???

[darkinferno]

apparently it knew how much you wanted to tell me about these plans

or it's fucking things up as usual, take your pick

same honestly

[darkinferno]

pretty good, but come on

you should have that last bullet point listed under HONORS AND RECOGNITIONS

[twelfthspark]

Uuuuugh it's barely even a plan yet!

Guess this explains my Retrospec feed the past couple days though

[alienates]

The failures of the high school educational system strikes again.
We should petition for them to teach us how to build a resume instead of whatever other unimportant subject they force upon their youth that said youth is just going sleep through.
Thank you, kind sir, for pointing out this terrible error.

[darkinferno]

you're telling me

so many glitches it's barely worth using

you keep dancing around the subject though, are you gonna tell me what's going on or not? you're looking for a house?

[darkinferno]

of course

my benevolence knows no bounds when it comes to teaching my brethren the most successful ways to build resumes to best showcase their pure and utter spite for others

[go with sass, my child]

[alienates]

Is it appropriate for me to just start calling you sensei now?
I'll bring you apples that you can proudly set on your desk, but never actually eat, as it's just a symbol for the power you hold over your students who depend on your vast knowledge of pettiness in order to advance in life.

keywords so frickin' relevant lmao

[darkinferno]

i suppose you can do that

i'll make sure you stand under ice-cold waterfalls in the dead of winter

not because it'll actually help you but because watching you try not to sneeze during bullshit meditation practices is how i get my kicks out of babysitting high-schoolers

[alienates]

Every single day I am introduced to someone's kink that I never asked to learn about.