darkinferno | [ic inbox]

Good god, what kind of blackmail material do you have on him?

it means i'm a designer duh!
and a makeup artist ☆*。★ﾟ*♪ヾ(☆ゝз・)ノ
the cafe work is just side stuff for extra money because you don't really make bank as a designer unless you're top label

yeah that makes sense, i don't know if i could either...

[It's tough to think about, honestly. He cares so much for Ari, but she's forgotten everything he's been going through, everything he's been struggling against. How could a relationship like that last?]

so who knows? maybe she's one of those that doesn't care

just don't try to impress her by doing fancy shit, she's probably seen it all before. go for something simple but meaningful and that'll leave a much more memorable impression

shitty pick-up lines don't work unless you know how to use them right, don't even try

if you go up to her asking for help with bio because you need to learn how to unzip genes/jeans you're asking to be punched

it's not that hard leo think about how you'd want her to ask you out if the tables were turned, if you want to date her i'm assuming you guys have some of the same interests so she's the same sort of nerd you are

am i wrong?

you said it was a way for people to connect to the internet remotely that connected you to other people too that could reach over a long distance

the only difference is talking with your mouth and talking with your mind

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯]

don't apologize, i'm not telling you this to make it seem like you don't have the right to be upset or something, if i wanted to tell you that i wouldn't have wasted my time being honest and telling you about the nightmares

what i'm saying is we're all in the same boat here

there are a lot of us that are... scared

of what we might do or who we might become

but we can't let fear stop us

[How's he dealing with it? By finding the bottom of a bottle, honestly--or at least, he had been for a week or so.]

what am i supposed to do then i dont want to hurt anyone but all ive done since august started was kill a vision of killing someone killing monsters here some of those monsters looked human im scared im going to become desensitized to it then what will i do?

none, he texted me last night to ask if he could confess a secret to me

the secret was that he actually hates cats

[[and given that my housemates' cat just dragged a dead cricket upstairs to the living room, I UNDERSTAND THE FEELING]]

huh

i guess that explains why you wanted to set people's coats on fire

[Good question, Cleo. Dante's got to think about his answer, because just over two weeks ago he was in the same spot as she is now, and he's not entirely certain he's made his peace with the idea yet. It's just... gotten easier with time. With the people around him.]

somebody else told me that most people go through life never knowing what they can do because they never find themselves in a position where the stakes are high enough

you know what you can do. that means you know the traps you've gotta avoid already

if you're worried about becoming desensitized to it, you can start taking steps now to make sure that doesn't happen. what made fighting those monsters different than fighting against me or tatsuo? there's gotta be a REASON you fight

[And in spite of how he presents himself to the rest of the world, Dante already knows his own answer: he fights to protect the people around him. That's why it's important for him to continue improving, for him to always be at the top of his game.]

once you figure that out, it might help a bit

[There's a long pause before she replies, so much so that he'd be forgiven for thinking she had gone to sleep. She had to think, long and hard about it. For what reason does she fight? She knows... But, in practice...]

i want to protect people. i want to protect everyone around me. i want to make sure no one ends up in the same position i was in. i want to make sure no one else loses their families and has to grow up alone. innocent people should never be hurt. there has to be justice, that innocents are protected and the wicked are punished. but how can i do that when i'm the one who hurt tatsuo, the closest one i have to family?

[He isn't surprised that the answer takes a long time to come. He's asked a difficult question, after all; if she needs to take the night or even a couple days to think about it, he'll still be here waiting when she's ready.

But while her response takes time, his is swift.]

if you want to protect people, you have to see them as individuals. they're not a group, they're the guy who's just finding a long-lost sibling, the girl that's trying to realize her dream, the guy who's been alone for so long he's forgotten what it's like to have people around him, the girl who's scared but fighting anyways

the boy who wants to get out of his tiny hometown or the girl who's trying to find where she came from

if you let them into your heart you'll never take them for granted, you'll find what you're looking for

but if you keep pushing people away... that's how you desensitize yourself

that's how you lose yourself

[Which one of them is he talking about...?]

what happened at the dojo was an accident

talk to tatsuo and apologize and i'm sure he'll understand, he's a pretty good guy

Those are surprisingly specific examples...

[But she does feel better now, as her typing indicates.]

Thank you. And, it's not much, but I am capable of a little bit of healing magic. It won't be enough to heal what I did to you, but it should at least help a little. I'm sorry again. He is a good guy. I consider him a brother.

that's the point

every person's got their own specific life

you can't look at them as one giant group of "people" or they'll become some mass group with blank faces in your mind that you can isolate yourself from. you've gotta look at the people around you and find what you're fighting for in THEM

that's what'll make you stronger

don't worry about me too much, souji's got magic too and helped me out

[Dante. You were just telling her to find reason to fight in the people around her. Don't push her away now...

He hates admitting to his own weaknesses, but Dante frowns at his phone as he relents:]

he couldn't heal everything though so i won't say no if you want to try

you've got nothing to apologize for though i already told you

it's okay

Edited 2017-09-18 04:12 (UTC)

That's difficult. I had never made a friend in my life until Retrospec. I'm already isolated. Or... I was until recently. Please let me try. Even if you say I don't need to apologize, I want to at least try to help fix what damage I've caused. I don't want to be a burden on others.

you'll be okay

just keep showing up. remember?

[The second half of his text is just an address for an apartment in Birch Hills. That's answer enough, right?]

hey.

how old are you, or whatever?

You're right... Thank you. I'm on my way. I'll be there soon.

see you then

depends on why you're asking

What
Uhhh...okay? I'm confused, but okay.

Well that and I got to meet a lot of people, so it wasn't all that bad until last month...

Really? How was it back then?

i want to ask you to hang out but the location changes depending on your ability to get into a bar

i've got a fake

as long as it's not cabin 11, the owner knows and we've got an understanding that he doesn't rat me out and i don't get my booze from there

where do you want to meet?

that's against the law but i doubt you care, i certainly didnt when i was younger so whatever.

maybe you should just come over, where im not at risk of being party to fraud and you can actually drink with me

i own a lot of fancy alcohol

[SWEET CHRIST]

Poor thing. I can't believe he's held it in so long, frankly. I've only had my cat for a day and I can't bother pretending to be in love.

[and yet she's keeping it, so . . .]

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