[ic inbox]

[darkinferno]

Dante Rantanen

"Hey, you've reached Dante. I'm not in right now--you know what to do."

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

[ keybladers ]
[ shitpost central ]

Comments

misfire 9/4

[kittycaterer]

so go for it and give him our picture
i told you
theres like 0 things about you to dislike

[darkinferno]

i'm pretty sure you got the wrong person because i can tell you plenty of things to dislike about me

so who's in this mysterious picture you're giving out to a stranger








is it prompto

[kittycaterer]

[ Mother.













Fucker. NOT AGAIN. ]

no
its your mom

[darkinferno]

so where'd you find her? tell her to come visit it's been over fifteen years

[He's... actually not really that bitter. That his mom left him behind and never cared to find out anything about him is an old wound long healed over.]

[kittycaterer]

[ Nice save, Noctis. Great job!

Boy, if he grimaced any harder, his mouth would tear. ]

something is up with the network
ignore the text

[ AVOIDING THE QUESTION. ]

[darkinferno]

yeah i know, i've been getting misfires all day long

so you never answered my question

who was the text FOR?

[kittycaterer]

maybe it was for you
maybe i want to take a picture with you
maybe i want you to share it

[ Nope. We're not talking about Prompto, Dante. ]

[darkinferno]

well damn noct

why didn't you tell me sooner

and me without a collared shirt on

i'll call prompto, i'm sure he'd be willing to take the pic

[why do you encourage him, Noctis]

[kittycaterer]

[ You know what? He's just going to fucking own it at this point, because he knows that denying anything is fuel to this guy's fire. So fine. Roll with it, Noct. ]

you know me
shy and nervous
didnt know how to tell you

[ OhgodbutreallydontcallPrompto ]

[darkinferno]

[Honestly, rolling with it is the best thing you can do when dealing with Dante.]

oh yeah, a real shrinking violet

why would i be offended by

[This is 100% misfiring, whoops]

[kittycaterer]

[ Whoops! ]

offended by what?
my forwardness?
yeah that took a lot of work

[darkinferno]

OFFENDED BY THE FACT THAT RETROSPEC SENT THE REST OF THAT TEXT TO GRELL WHAT THE FUCK

[darkinferno]

she's giving me tips on word choice on how to reel you in

i don't know if this was a mistake or if i should be warning you to watch out for when i put them into use

[This is simultaneously the biggest "WHAT THE FUCK" moment but also hilarious too? He doesn't even know how to feel about this right now.]

[kittycaterer]

[ HAH.

That quite literally makes Noctis laugh. Dante can't hear it or see it, but boy does he feel less embarrassed about his misfire now. ]

rip
also now i have to know what the rest of the text said
try me

[darkinferno]

"a guy like you wanting to get up close and personal

trying to respect my personal space or something? you don't have to bother"

[Please note that he changed it according to Grell's instructions.]

gay chicken is a thing and you're playing with the wrong person

[kittycaterer]

[ LMAO ]

a guy like me huh?
yup
smitten

[ Listen, he hasn't played gay chicken with Prompto yet, but let's be real here. Their relationship as a whole is a giant game of gay chicken.

He's no noobie. ]

[darkinferno]

damn right

a guy like you

it's that whole shrinking violet thing

[kittycaterer]

[ That actually made him laugh. ]

you definitely strike me as a dude into the damsel in distress thing
full disclosure
i can be that damsel

[ Listen, if this deviates away from the subject of Prompto, he'll take it. ]

[darkinferno]

what can i say? i know my strengths

just don't expect me to start quoting shakespeare at you, somebody else has a claim to that first

i could definitely rescue you from your tower prison though

[This conversation just keeps getting dumber and dumber.]

[kittycaterer]

im more into brannigans love
just like brannigans law
hard and fast

[ it's not dumb enough. ]

[darkinferno]

so nix the pants when i come to the rescue

got it

[kittycaterer]

makes it easier
cuts time
and time is money, right?

[ WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS ]

[darkinferno]

noct listen just be honest you want a chance to ogle my legs

it's okay you don't need to make excuses for me to go without pants all you've gotta do is ask

[kittycaterer]

i feel like youd take them off even without someone asking
be gentle with me im weak and feeble

[darkinferno]

only if i'm with friends, i'm not into the whole forced voyeurism thing

besides

you're not THAT weak and feeble

[Don't go making it skeevy, Noct...!]